Growing Comfortable With Grief

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Many of us are grieving right now. Whether this pandemic has caused trauma among your family, or you have separate issues going on in life not even correlated, this is undoubtedly a tough time for many, and grief isn’t an uncommon emotion.

I’ve written a post before about handling grief, but it’s something I wanted to touch on today, as it’s becoming more prevalent during this specific time in life. Grief is uncomfortable, it’s painful, and unfortunately, it’s something we’ll all experience throughout life. Knowing it’s inevitable doesn’t make it any easier.

Moving on from grief isn’t an option for many of us. We can’t just release the memories, the feelings, the love in our soul we have for this person. While life goes on, we can’t erase this period of our life. When someone you loved impacted the choices you make, the way you feel about yourself, the way you communicate with others, you can’t simply erase the touch this person had on your life, even if they’re no longer physically in it.

Keep this person and these memories with you, and continue living life how you want to live it, knowing you will have forever been graced with this person’s touch.

Many of us feel guilty when we “move on.” Just because you’re starting a new beginning doesn’t mean you have to forget this person and everything they’ve taught you. They’re still with you forever, and you never need to release those memories. It’s these memories, and even this trauma, that can end up having a huge impact on who you become.

Remember that grief comes in different shapes and sizes. We all are at different seasons of life, and we all handle it differently. There isn’t a right or wrong way to grieve and there isn’t an expected amount of time to be grieving. Our experiences are all different, as our relationships are unique. How you grieve for one person may not be the same way you grieve for another. And your grief, while maybe having similarities to someone else’s, will never be exactly the same. What you can and should prioritize during this time, is taking care of yourself. Rest plenty and make sure you’re eating. Often, grief can be so painful it hurts our stomach and diminishes our appetite. Take care of not just your mind and emotions, but your body as well.

Accept your emotions, remembering what you’re feeling is normal, even if you don’t know anyone who can relate. Accept the discomfort, remembering the pain will eventually come to subside. Most importantly, know that even though it hurts to be away from someone you love, they’re always going to be with you as you continue on. They’re with you when you go for a jog at 7am every morning, a healthy habit they helped you to start. They’re with you when you choose to wear that green sweater because you know green was their favorite color. This person touched your soul and will forever have an impact on who you are. Your life will continue, but your loved ones are never forgotten.

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